Friday, September 25, 2009

Reckless tag-pulling-off

29 weeks and 5 days today. Only 30 days until our C-section unless things change dramatically and then it could be even sooner!

Something big is happening in my house today. Tags are being ripped off of clothing, baby blankets are being washed, diapers put away. I am getting ready for our boys, our sweet boys to come home. Until now, the fear of loss has been too strong. The memory of our miscarriages, of the promise of life and babies taken away has stolen from us the excitement and joy that comes with most pregnancies. I was terrified to purchase anything baby related this pregnancy until 28 weeks, with a few exceptions. I imagined the pain of putting something into a box and hiding it in the garage should the worst happen, and our boys don't survive. Hope seems to be popping up around here, as we near the big milestone of 30 weeks. The fear seems to be getting pushed over a little bit.

Today I had a great appointment. I half expected her to say, "Just kidding! Into the hospital with you!" but remarkably, Dr. P is thrilled with me and our trio. My cervix is the same. THE SAME! It has not changed since 24 weeks, which is remarkable. After the ultrasound, she remarked, "Your cervical length is actually normal now. It was not normal at 24 weeks, but it has not changed at all, and anyone carrying triplets at nearly 30 weeks should have a cervix like yours." If my husband was not there to witness, I might think I hallucinated the whole thing.

The boys are looking busy and active, all getting 8 out of 8 points on their Biophyscial Profiles. This means basically, that they are practicing breathing, showing movement and muscle tone, and have normal fluid levels. Our guys are only eligible for 8 instead of 10 because I do not have to have an NST to go with it, thank goodness. Still no signs of TTTS.

My husband, sweetie that he is, asked Dr. P if I would be allowed out to dinner for our four year anniversary this weekend. She said yes, and we discussed our favorite local restaurants. We talked about where would be a good place for me to be dropped off and picked up, but then she said, "You can increase your activity a little bit, to your comfort level and assuming your contractions don't pick up. Still rest most of the time, but you can get up a little more now." I told her that I didn't want to do much, since I contract a lot when I am up, and get tired easily, but her giving me a bit of freedom was AWESOME! I think it will make all the difference in my sanity and hopefully will make no difference in my cervix.

Don't worry, Readers: I am always very good and lay down most of the day, more so if contractions pick up. I am not heading out to run a marathon (or even walk to the mailbox) but I have been cleared for Target Scooter Rides. I have not been in any store in about 8 weeks, and this is exciting! I have not been able to peruse baby clothes or gear unless online (thank goodness for the Internet) so this tiny bit of freedom is thrilling. I am so thankful to still be pregnant, a fact I never take for granted. This just feels like a bonus.

Something about being almost 30 weeks (Oh, and did I mention the negative fFN today?) and likely getting to 32 or beyond makes me feel a bit reckless. Watch out for bouncy seat assembly and major laundering of clothing at our house. All the while, I hope that I will bring three boys home later this fall, that we will be some of the lucky ones. Fear is still so present in most of my actions and my thoughts about the boys, but slowly, excitement is creeping in. Excitement and hope.

(I did not just jinx myself, right?)

23 comments:

  1. You did NOT just jinx yourself- rip those tags lady!!! And Happy Anniversary!

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  2. I am so happy you are in this positive space!

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  3. Tag ripping, how fun! Almost 30 weeks, what a fantastic achievement, well done to all of you!

    And congratulations on your 4th anniversary, have a fabulous dinner together, one you will remember for a long time after the chaos that will undoubtedly come with 3 more babies!

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  4. I am so happy for you! You totally deserve it. I love this post. I've been wondering the same thing. I want to set up cribs and get "the room" ready but I'm totally not sure..

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  5. YAY!!!!! I'm so excited for you honey!! I'm so happy that the boys are doing great!! PRaise GOD!!! Enjoy every minute of it...it's going to go by quickly now; ((HUGS))

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  6. This is the best news of the day, maybe even the whole week!!!!! YAY

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  7. Thirty weeks is awesome!!!! Rip away, girl, you deserve it. Can't *wait* to meet those little men, even if it's just their sweet baby toes. (Okay, I can wait 30 more days. You know what I mean.) :)

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  8. Happy news! You're so lucky to have Target, we don't get those in Canada. Target is my own personal heaven...

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  9. WOOHOO I'm so excited for you!! 34 weeks, here you come!! :D

    Just crazily happy that your cervix is doing so well and that the fFN was negative again. It must feel so great to be getting baby items ready and putting them away.

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  10. YAHOO! Such wonderful news. Absolutely, have fun getting those baby things ready now!

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  11. Carrie, WOO HOO! Now I bet that feels good, doesn't it?! Very soon these boys will be here and you will be BUSY BUSY. Take it easy while you still can. I'm just a few weeks behind you.. (due Nov 18) so I'm about 20 days behind you. EEK! It's coming so fast, isn't it?! It's weird to think that I'm farther along, but you'll have your boys before I have my boy. How cool.

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  12. i've been following you for a few weeks now...you haven't jinxed yourself. a girl i know just had her 3 girls via csec at 35 weeks, all just over 4 pounds each. She felt the same as you all the way through with worry. I have no doubts you will be just like her in a few weeks time, cuddling your 3 new babies x amanda australia x

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  13. YAY!!! You are so close sister!!! I am so happy for you. You are going to get into those thirties and make your c-section date. I just know it! No earlier than that!

    And happy anniversary- enjoy your dinner out!

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  14. That is AWESOME...enjoy your night out...and THEN, get yourself all dolled up for that scooter ride. :-) . WoooHooooo.

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  15. What a wonderful update!

    I can feel the excitement and joy through your words!

    Rip a way those tags! AND yay for a little more freedom!

    Happy Anniversary!

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  16. That's GREAT!!!! I'm so happy for you! Get crazy and do some laundry of tiny little things and maybe even do some folding ;)

    I walked to the mailbox yesterday...it felt like a ran a marathon...haha. Oh my, there's just not an oz of muscle left in me...it's going to be interesting when I go back to exercising!. BUT it's all worth it...so hang in there. Just a few more weeks and you'll have your precious little ones with you :)

    Happy Anniversary!!!!!!

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  17. So exciting! Your cervix is such a champ.

    Happy anniversary -- I hope you have a great night out!!

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  18. Happy Anniversary, and happy 30 weeks today!

    The transition from fear to excitement is one of the better transitions I've experienced.

    I'm allowed to go out to eat once a week starting at 34w, if I make it that far. Target on a scooter sounds kind of fun, except that my husband would be miserable the whole time while he accompanied me. The dr would have let me go to the movies instead of dinner at 34w except that a certain boy won't let me sit up for more than a couple of minutes because it squashes his head, so sitting for 2h at a movie is totally out of the question.

    Enjoy it all!

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  19. WOOT! WOOT! 30w 1d - I just knew you could do it! Once, October seemed still so far away, but not anymore!

    OCTOBER OR BUST! Or maybe the chant should now be 34 WEEKS or BUST!!! I'll have to work on a new poster... ;)

    BIG HUGS!!!

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  20. You are on a roll now and you know it :)
    Can you or your mom send me your address please -I have a little something for the little guys.

    Happy anniversary!
    Sylvi

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  21. I can't believe I forgot to comment on this landmark post! Rip off those tags, mama, you are bringing THREE BOYS home soon! Very soon!

    I would to be there and help with the ceremonious tag-ripping-off and subsequent laundering, though I am not the best at folding, so I would leave that to you and St. Gramma. :)

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  22. Woo Hoo! I truly hope that your reprieve/parole from strict bedrest is enjoyable! I'm really happy that your cervix has finally learned to be 'normal' and that your precious boys are all doing so well. Continuing to send prayers and good thoughts!

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