Back in those young, carefree going out days, I recall (barely) the habit of men to not look at a woman in the face, but in the, um, chest. Not only do you feel like someone is not listening to you when their gaze strays lower, but it can be a bit offensive. I would occasionally say, before walking away, "My eyes are actually up HERE."
I am finding myself thinking this again. Not to interested men, in fact it is mostly women of child bearing age. Why would they want to check out my rack, you ask? No, no no. They are checking out my abdomen. For a baby bump. They are desperately searching for signs of pregnancy instead of just asking. 'Cause that would be rude! But staring at someone's not-swollen-with-baby-stomach is not.
Maybe I should print a shirt: "Not Pregnant Yet" or even "Still Barren". Thoughts? Are you ever assaulted with veiled questions ("Are you drinking? What about eating sushi?) by nosy Fertiles?
Waves Hello! Thanks for stopping by my blog--
ReplyDeleteI was more the victim of those eyes--you know, the eyes of the grandparents, as they look from you to the first born...especially since we were the first ones to have a grandchild...
Often the questions were more like "So you going to give Michael a little playmate soon?"
Ugh!
Wishing you luck on your cycle!
Why do you feel there is such a divide between fertiles and infertiles? Do you become "fertile" after having children following a battle with infertility? Too many times I've seen on blogs the divisiveness of fertiles vs. infertiles. That's not the way the real world is.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe "fertiles" are as malicious as they are made out to be. In fact I think it is WAY more offensive to be repeatedly asked about how my twins were conceived (via Clomid). Maybe people in general are just rude, but I know first hand that I would never have mal intent toward anyone going through IF because I've been there.
Interesting point of view. No, I don't believe that fertile people are malicious, but sometimes people going through infertility DO feel a division. Perhaps that was not your experience, but it is mine.
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